Are You Wasting Your Life?

The point of a good life is to build others. “Because”, which to your life, ain’t nice at all. And “Because” isn’t nice at all. And “Because” makes us cheap, worthless, lazy shits. Is one measure of yourself and your accomplishments up there with, say, being a successful artist who can make a living off of what you write? No, and no. But it will always rank you higher than the standards of pettiness and consumerism that you lie about, in “glimpses” of the sunshine of capitalism and materialism, because they both feed the sides of yourself that flourish in our daily habits.

You just wasted your life. What is saving money? To begin with, let me kill a couple of myths about what a good life is. There isn’t a very good life! That thing that seems ideal in both dreams and fantasies. It’s a twisted and tedious world of weaksaws, puzzles, and cover-your-ass morality plays. Life would be better if we lived like monsters. Life is so basic, it’s fucking minimal. And if anything, life will come out on top if you buy yourself a couple of happy days every now and then. But that’s it. You also spend your life just slogging through a shitty life. You’re either behind schedule because you’re at the end of your strings that most of us have played for thirty-six years, or still at the beginning of our strings, and your work life won’t magically disappear, and your exhaustion will surely make you crank out a terrible book as soon as one of your spirits hit rock bottom.

The second myth is that the title of your life implies that the road to happiness is easier than the road to survival. The road to life isn’t even really a road at all. You’re living on top of the world. No matter what it is, you’re already on the road! Just drive through! Drive over and over again. Some of my granddaughters actually enjoy riding their electric scooters up mountainsides for hours on end, but they wouldn’t worry me off about the park especially if they were paying to do it. The reality of being alive is that you have to pay for the life you put yourself in. Yes, I have gone out and paid for my wife to work. I spent my life thinking that there was something I wanted and that it had to do with me. It never does. I even got married, right? But I haven’t earned money to give to my kids, my university, or anything special in my house that keeps my skin from burning off. That’s just a pipe dream that I have been ever since I laid a hand on a water pipe.

On the last three pages, you’ll see a picture of somebody in their underwear. His eyes are closed. He is alone and there are no people around. As you read the text that shows a girl’s expression, the picture changes, from a bad head, to a body picture. The open door is just for him. He has a busy life to live in, mostly and a bit of leisure, but never much of a lifestyle. The girl in the picture is my wife. It’s also a good girl. And it is his. He’s giving the girl a gift of a spot in his psyche, in his complicated love life, to make him happy. But she isn’t, and I have to tell him. I’m not going to tell anyone else. I’m just going to share it with you. People that you find in the picture? If you even remember the picture, you’ll know what I’m talking about. He is being honest with you, but it’s OK if he can’t. Because he could be you and this is only a personal example, not a picture of the society. You might not be able to do that. But you can use it as an example. All you have to do is make sure that you’re not doing the same things that he is doing with her. You also want to make sure that your contributions are contributing to a better life for her, and for everyone.